Youll go far someday. What is the most creative reply to, are you still alive? However, we wouldn't recommend you to overdone your sarcasm. You nervously reply "yeah, but I'm a little busy and-", only for one person to reply "um, no one asked you. I was hoping you would be able to tell me that. So the next time someone asks you why you're still. It can be good to just say it how it is. Living a life of suppressed rage, emotional imbalance, and denial. If someone clearly doesnt want to talk to you, the best thing to do is not talk to them. While I'd love to give you the technique behind his funny comeback I can't. He may simply be one of the quickest minds in the West. Congratulations, sir. If you knock on my hearts door, I might let you in. Feel my shirt. No? 54 Exciting What If Questions - Best Ways You'll Love Fun - Mantelligence Ever wanted to be the wise-ass who always has a comeback for everything? 57. Because I prefer the company of dogs/cats rather than humans. Acting like a prick doesnt make yours grow bigger. 11. I plead the fifth. Privacy Policy. 65. I repeat I am plural! Perfect for that BRB, shower text that they never BRBd to. I cant complain, not that anyone listens anyway. 10. via: Pexels / George Pak. Scientists say the universe is made up of electrons, protons, and neutrons. Nikhil Saluja, "Immortality . (Explained). If youre going to be two-faced, you could at least make one of them pretty. Talk is cheapbut then again, so are you. 32. Maybe they like you so much that it triggered some kind of reaction that ended their life. Because Ive been waiting for you all my life. There is nothing wrong with responding with a funny or witty remark if youre getting annoyed with repetitive questions. I hear good things; however, you should never listen to rumors. 35 Best Texts to Respond to a Date that has Ghosted You 62. Better than most, but maybe not as well as others. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. Rita Rudner (comedian), "When I die, I want my body to be donated for research, but more specifically, to a scientist who is working on bringing dead bodies back to life." Her sessions aim to bring about transformation in her clients lives, perspectives, and relationships. When someone takes a long time to reply, it can feel like an empire could have risen and fallen in that time. 150+ Funny and Witty Answers to the Question "How Are You?" This person is taking so long to reply, you will be waiting for geology to change before you get one. If I wanted to commit suicide, Id climb your ego and jump to your IQ level. 101. Why Give a Funny Response to an Everyday Question? [Read: How to be funny and make people love your company]. Are You Still Alive GIFs | Tenor Here are 55 funny coronavirus memes that will make you LOL. Hey, whered you get that nose? 60. "Still alive" is polite. Before you complain about anything, be thankful for your life and the things that are still going well.". Well, Im married to our lord and savior, Jesus Christ. Your lips are moving, but all I hear is blah, blah, blah.. I know youre nobodys fool, but maybe youll be adopted someday. (Say it like he or she is complimenting you even though he or she is not.) 86. Clever comebacks not only showcase your distastethey demonstrate your intelligence, too. Theres only one problem with your face: I can see it. No one will expect to hear it, so you'll be catching your friends off guard. Your relationship status is your business alone (and your partners, if you have one). See more ideas about maxine, bones funny, funny quotes. Perhaps you are just such an exciting person. "Can't complain" is a normal response to the question, but by throwing in the following sentence, you should get a laugh. Perhaps it will encourage them to respond quicker in the future. Physically? I firmly believe that a romantic relationship is a huge distraction. Well, I'm old enough to beat you in a marathon. Socrates (philosopher), "The reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated." (perfect for vegans). How Am I Still Alive. But, if they were, it would be a valid reason for them taking so long to reply. and our 39 Heartfelt Poems For Your Mom On Her Birthday, Mom And Daughter Relationship: Everything You Need To Know, 150 Special Ways To Wish Your Long-Distance Girlfriend On Her Birthday, 39 Long-Distance Love Letters To Show Your Love For Him, 51 Good Morning Messages For Her In A Long-Distance Relationship, 24 Beautiful And Touching Poems For People In Long-Distance Relationships, 15 Most Important Things In A Relationship, 61 Great Long-Distance Friendship Quotes And Sayings, 9 Important Qualities Of A Healthy And Happy Relationship. 10. - Anonymous. You enjoy making this girl smile and make her day with your humor. But, if you do say it, it will highlight the problem. If you are, then maybe were meant to be! Share the best GIFs now >>> More like give me a sign that. 28. People will often tell you Im too busy to text you back. funny response to are you still alive - claudiovoiceovers.com To read all future answers to your comment, please bookmark this page. 99 Savage And Funny Answers To "How Old Are You?" He sold it to me on his deathbed. Maybe this person really likes you, and they have a heart condition. Thats why Im single. People tend to ask the same questions whenever you see them, which is why you should have a few different replies to "How are you?" but it's just so blunt and funny. I'm alive! The person who told you to be yourself gave you some bad advice. Edgar A Shoaff (author), "Death is a very narrow theme, but it reaches a wide audience." To answer that question, I need to take you back about 12 years. The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers to this website may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website. Get the very best of LovePanky straight to your inbox! Is It A Bad Idea To Lose My Virginity To An Old Crush? 100+ Funny and Clever Answers to "Why Are You Still Single?" Welcome to Grammarhow!We are on a mission to help you become better at English. 30 Funny Comebacks For Late Messages - Grammarhow For instance, have you hooked up since you've broken up? Just look what happened there! Or "Better than some, not as good as others.". (Wriggle your hips), Oh, stop it, will you? No, waitIm actually plural. For instance, a friend will be amused when you sarcastically reply, Not today, Satan! However, I need to take you back about 12 years to answer that question. 17. Are you going to help me have a good day? But, if you do say it, it will highlight the problem. Maybe they had a giant project at work and lost contact with all their friends and loved ones. Voice command: Alexa, I am your father. [Read: How to be a fun texter and make anyone laugh while reading your texts]. "It's your ego that wants to lash out," Winter tells Bustle. I am better on the inside than I look on the outside. Youre like Monday: no one likes you. Do you have a minute? If someone takes a long time to reply, it can feel much longer than it is. TikTok video from Mark Winston (@markwinstonbball): "Are you still alive? Alright so far, but there is plenty of time for things to get bad. You are waiting for their reply, and they should be aware of this. Don't Push It Too Far. 27. Do you have a minute? is perfect for lunch-time banter with colleagues. It might seem like a joke, but this is what I think. I hated you the moment I met you, and I still hate you. He will be missed. 2. Tom Lehrer - Wikipedia It would be easy to answer that question with a simple "I'm fine, thank you.". Martin has been featured as an expert in communication and teaching on Forbes and Shopify. Just so you know, I value me time over we time. Here are 28 of the best ghosting responses to send someone whos been ignoring you. Use the opportunity to make a good impression. 40. Nah, just kidding (though it might be true to some of you). If your crush asks you how you are, you might as well be honest. The best I can be. The following responses dont require wit, but do require a funny bone. I once showed up twenty-four hours early for a date. Humans are very complex creatures, but we're also creatures of habit who say one thing when we mean another. With a self-assured stance and casual body language, you won't create any . 9. You dont need to say it. Oh, what a long list. 56. Im in a relationship with myself. Are you always this dumb, or are you making a special effort today? Use them as you see fit when someone pokes their nose on your relationship status. On the plus side, a little humor injected into someones day can have a positive impact on their otherwise average day! 3. I dont tell you how to live your life, dont tell me how to live mine thanks. If they are not going to reply, perhaps the archaeologists who discover their phone will. You can use variations, such as, "Well enough to chat with you if you wish.". You just have bad luck at thinking. 54. So, ditch the mechanical responses and adopt the witty and fun replies to keep the conversations exciting! Sometimes, it can be hard thinking on your feet, especially when youre joking around with your friends or in the midst of a heated exchange. "If at first, you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.". However, it is best to stick to the basics with a colleague. Tell her that you're there for her to make her laugh, if she needs some company. Thomas Andrew Lehrer (/ l r r /; born April 9, 1928) is an American musician, singer-songwriter, satirist, and mathematician, who later taught mathematics and musical theater.He recorded pithy and humorous songs that became popular in the 1950s and 1960s. As a result, they were so fixated on thinking about you, they forgot to reply to you. So much better than most people. With Tenor, maker of GIF Keyboard, add popular Are You Still Alive animated GIFs to your conversations. Use sarcasm to let them know that you do not approve. You are about as interesting as a documentary on dirt. I had been dead for billions of years before I was born and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience. Mark Twain (author), Im not afraid to die, I just dont want to be there when it happens. Woody Allen (comedian), The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates. Dave Barry (author), Always go to other peoples funerals, otherwise they wont come to yours. Yogi Berra (baseball player), Im very pleased to be here. 59. Of course, you don't want to brag, which is why this funny line is useful. funny response to are you still alive - hazrentalcenter.com By acting as though they are replying too fast, you highlight the fact that they are replying too slow. In fact, theyre taking too much of it. Once youre dead, youre made for life. Jimi Hendrix (musician), Death will be a great relief, no more interviews. Katharine Hepburn (actress), Death is a delightful hiding place for weary men. Herodotus (historian), You know youre old when the candles cost more than the cake. Bob Hope (comedian), Some men are alive simply because it is against the law to kill them. EW Howe (author), There are more dead people than living, and their numbers are increasing. 9 Best Ways To Ask Someone To Talk On The Phone, 9 Other Ways to Say Im Good At on a Resume, 10 Polite Ways to Say No Visitors after Surgery, 11 Best Ways to Say Im Here for You to a Loved One, 10 Professional Ways to Say I Am Not Feeling Well. Now you can be! 2 I ask for your birth chart one time, and suddenly, I'm a mind-reading witch that knows what you're thinking. And maybe thats the reason why theyre taking so long to reply. Is it your job to spread ignorance? What should I doI like you too much. What to say when your crush asks how you are? Obviously, thats because I dont have a boyfriend/girlfriend! My bed only has enough room for me and my dog. 10. Trying to understand the meaning of life or the universe at least. You may join me, though. I dont feel that great, but look! Aeldrion 5 yr. ago. funny response to are you still alive. Sort: Relevant Newest # living # seth meyers # im here # its me # lnsm # tired # dead # shot # arrows # loser # hello # hi # hey # tap # listen # alive # pearl jam # eddie vedder # i'm good # i'm ok Who knows, maybe you can steer a conversation in a more intriguing path. More like, How I Met That Jerk I Quickly Forgot About. original sound - Tyren Sams. This one is good. The way youre acting vs reality creates a juxtaposition that highlights their slowness. If ignorance barrel prices go up, I want drilling rights to his head. What Is A Micro Wedding And How To Plan It? Looks like I overestimated the number of brain cells you have. I'd love to give you a nasty look, but it appears you already have one. Tell them to stop being nosy and avoid answering. Mentally? At minding my own business? It's definitely a better reply than the standard, "I'm fine.". A real low-life. In such a case, if you are unavailable to communicate with new clients right away, you can use auto responses instead. funny response to are you still alive 09 June 2022. no disease, including cancer, can exist in an alkaline environment / siberian husky mask types Whats a funny way to respond to the question 'Are you still alive?' What do you say when people ask you that? (Use a sexy tone). 3 I'm Just Wondering How You Are 90 Sarcastic Quotes for Witty Comebacks Full of Sarcasm - Quote Ambition Oh, stop it, will you? If you are in a coma, then that is a valid excuse for not texting back. Voice command: Alexa, define rock paper scissors lizard Spock. Thats because theres no vacancy in my heart. Because a single-storey is much more economical than a double-storey. Follow us on Instagram Facebook Twitter Pinterest and we promise, well be your lucky charm to a beautiful love life. Well, I have to go to work so Ill try and make the best of it. Who knows, they might just do it. Whether you're in the jury or on the witness stand or on trial yourself, it's a tense and nail-biting environment. I dont have time to accommodate other human beings in my life! No, I'm Finnish. Check out the following infographic for some practical tips to maintain a conversation and take it forward.SaveIllustration: StyleCraze Design Team. Hope this status quo persists for the rest of the day.". "See, I will finally make you smile.". Whats with all these questions? We all grow up as we get older. Funny responses to "How are you?" Photo courtesy of Canva. However, the time it takes for a puppy to grow up is a lot longer than it should take for someone to reply to your message. upstart loan login; jim bell siloam mission salary; . Image: wikimedia commons 6. How to answer when someone asks me, "Are you still alive - Quora Your hair looks great! These comebacks are best for those situations where you dont just want to insult someoneyou want to own the room. You are living proof that manure can learn to walk and talk. 86 Funny and Flirty Responses To 'How Are You Doing?' - Monk at 25 Some people may have thyroid problems, but I can tell youre fat because youre lazy. And it's time for me to make my escape. This one is funny when you havent said anything. 9. Have a nice life." This text is excellent because you are making him or her feel guilty about ghosting you. 5. 350 opinions shared on Guy's Behavior topic. Alexa's response: No, that's not true. Maybe because I have a Ph.D. in impatience. Try a Humorous Reply when Someone Asks "How Are You?" - All Women's Talk If youre still single, some people will ask you for a reason or explanation, in one way or another. 14. Nothing that you probably cant figure out if you tried. They used to call them jumpolines, until your mom jumped on one. Me being single is just a conspiracy! I used to think you were a pain in the neck. I only went to the gym four times instead of my usual five." Sarcastic response: "Yeah totally. I havent found anyone who matches my kinks yet. I really thought you already knew. For your information, Im in a relationship with food. Impressive! But, whats the likelihood of that happening? I bet if you stood on a street corner, youd make some money. provided, of course, that he really is dead." There are nosy people everywhere! The person will likely pick up on the joke, making this awkward situation something that can be laughed off. We cant always get what we want now, can we? Thats why Im rooting for your penis. 12. Rather than kicking yourself later when you think of something clever you should have said, keep a few witty insults and comebacks at the ready, just in case. How do you want me to be? Well, are you? Grab a few of these snarky but oh-savage good comebacks ahead of time, and youll be ready to win any argument. This one gets to the point of what they want to know, it's humorous, and it makes ya think. Watch the video: Only 1 percent of our visitors get these 3 grammar questions right 30 Best Responses To An Apology For A Late Reply. [Read: 12 types of humor you can use and how it affects the people around you]. Why is it OK for you to be an idiot, but not OK for me to point it out? Here, there are hilarious replies, witty comebacks, flirty responses, and many other answers to this question. Socioeconomically? It does seem like a massive gap doesnt it? This was one of the quickest ways there was to send a message from one person to another. Hopefully, not as good as I will ever be. Your birth certificate is an apology to your parents from the hospital. Thats because I get about as much attention as a white crayon. If I was any better, vitamins would be taking me. Its the same reason why I dont post pictures of myself. 25. A romantic relationship would severely impair my crime-fighting order of business. Without your thumbs, its unlikely you will be able to text anyone. Youre worse. It may come across as insensitive, but that's just how our current world works. Not so much. If you are in a coma, on the other hand, you are legally very much alive. Brilliant! 2. 29. Better inside than outside. You speak as if youre not single yourself! You look tired. 77. 88. 38. I hope you like some of them. conservation international ceo; little debbie peanut butter creme pies discontinued. Awwits so cute when you talk about things you dont understand. There might be little things that go wrong throughout your life, but at least you're still living it. My grandfather had a ton of these. 19. The next time the cat gets your tongue, heres a big list of good, witty, nasty, funny sarcastic and clever comebacks for every conversation, no matter where you are! This is perhaps not for the faint-hearted. 43. Im reminded of how unfair life is every time I see you. When someone really finds you funny over text, they may send laughing emoji or 'haha'. But half the time, it is a nightmare. #fyp #basketball #viral #fyp #viralvideo #funny #comedy". This does not seem right. Because if you are, youre doing it right. 2. Then I hope you find someone whos good looking, honest, smart, and cultured. Looking at my life, half the time I see that I don't live half of what I should! You grow on peoplebut then again, so does cancer. In fact, they're taking too much of it. 98. Do you ever find yourself getting annoyed with yourself because you just thought of an awesomely good comeback to something someone said earlier? Sarcastic Captions for Instagram. Here's a 13-second video explaining how Jennifer Lawrence uses this Surprise Theory: Were already married, remember?! Unknown, "He was a great patriot, a humanitarian, a loyal friend . If you've ever worked in an office, used municipal buildings or lived in a city, chances are, you already know what public notices are bland, dull, usually complaining and rarely funny posters that tell us somewhat useful information about all kinds of things. I have found that people in a coma find it very difficult to hold a phone, turn it on, look at their messages, think of a reply, and then type out their reply. Youre totally on the same page. Check out: Image credits Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash. Nowadays, potential mates need money. Hello, how are you? I dont know how you do it, but after a shower, you look even greasier. Everything is always better on payday right!? Are you asking just to make yourself feel better? Suppose you're about to join a group when they stop by and ask if you want to join. Is your family tree a cactus? IDK, pick your favorite fictional player. More like give me a sign that you're still alive. a fate worse than death." 3. There is not always a need to be so funny, witty, or clever. In the past, one way to send messages was to attach them to a pigeon. "Accept the facts for what they are, and be grateful you're not being strung along or played.". Theres this one time when a cute guy/gal asked me if I have a boyfriend/girlfriend and I said yes because I didnt hear the question. I was hoping you would be able to tell me that. Finnish with this conversation! 14. If you have nothing to add and to share with a person, this saves their day, too. Still Alive synonyms - 44 Words and Phrases for Still Alive I dont blame you, Ive had it up to my neck with annoying, repetitive, shallow everyday questions and I often respond with something funny, silly, or sarcastic to make it known. Because Im awkward and ugly. My psychiatrist says that I shouldnt discuss it with strangers. In reality, they are not cool, they are just rude. Id love to see things from your perspective, but its almost impossible to get my head up your ass that far. Funny Responses to "What Are You Doing?" What does it look like I'm doing? Im glad that I sleep so peacefully, knowing that Im single and aint nobody cheating on me tonight. Speak Now Or Forever Hold Your Peace: What Does It Mean? Steven Wright (comedian), "What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death." I text the same message ' are you alive' when I haven't heard from them in a while. What? Your email address will not be published. Some people are going to find your witty responses funny, and some people arent. 48 smart and sarcastic lines and quotes that kick ass! Or you could be humorous back at them and say "No, I'm not. He has six years of experience in professional communication with clients, executives, and colleagues. Hi! Im not single. What an impertinent question to ask a girl! Dont let your mind wander. June 14, 2022; pros and cons of stem cell therapy for knees . Youll never be even half the man your mother is. Often, we text some people when were at rock bottom, to try and get their help, or just have someone to talk to. *licks lips*. Hemali Adhiya, ICF Certified Relationship Coach, Expertise: Relationships, Marriage, Couples, Grief, Life Coaching, Hemali is an ICF-Certified ACC Level Life Coach with 3 years of experience in relationship, marriage, and grief coaching. Before I answer, I let you know that those who know my age get bad luck. What is the polite way for asking if someone is still alive? And trust us, once you use these lines, everyone will be ooh-ing to your snarky comments the next time someone dares to make fun of you! 3. The only way youll ever get laid is if you crawl up a chickens butt and wait. I favour the "How am I what?" I hope you are at your best too. Wondering How You Are 1 I'm Better on the inside than I Look on the outside This one works well when you're still in your pajamas or are having a bad hair day. 95+ Heartwarming Alive Jokes | buried alive, stayin alive jokes This is a good response to throw out there. I mean, no matter how amazing our lives are, there's always something to complain about. Getting better with every passing second. Everyone knows a happy dog wags his tail, so if you're feeling happy and joyful, this would be a good response to give to someone asking how you're doing because it's clever and unique. 1. Why would he text me "Are you still alive?"? - GirlsAskGuys Physically? Like "I am not a Sunday morning inside four walls with clean blood and organized drawers. Here, there are hilarious replies, witty comebacks, flirty responses, and many other answers to this question. - Adam Feb 23, 2016 at 17:08 I cant even afford to feed myself! I'm loved! I do admite that sometimes I hate life, sometimes my hate being in the world! At minding my own business? Oh, a thought crossed your mind? Because Id rather be alone than put up with someones sh*t! Here are some of the most humorous replies to "How are you? Get your own life first before you try sharing it. Every civilisation has its genesis and its conclusion. . Youre supposed to think that theyre so busy being cool that they dont have time for you. Turning the question around on them without actually having to answer? 20 Warning Signs You Are In A Codependent 20 Warning Signs You Are In A Codependent Relationship. Spiritually? Are you flirting with me right now? Listen, maybe your crush really did lose their phone. I cant afford to die; Id lose too much money. George Burns (comedian), I do not fear death. How do you think that I am doing? Tip #3 - Confidence is Key. Average, I think, that sounds about right. 7. The living are getting rarer. Eugene Lonesco (playwright), Dying is easy; its living that scares me to death. Annie Lennox (musician), If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the UP button. Sam Levenson (humorist), Ive looked that old scoundrel death in the eyes many times but this time I think he has me on the ropes. Douglas MacArthur (general), Those who welcome death have only tried it from the ears up. Wilson Mizner (playwright), The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades, especially if your teammates are bad guessers. Demetri Martin (comedian), I intend to live forever or die trying. Groucho Marx (comedian), Death is a very dull, dreary affair, and my advice to you is to have nothing whatsoever to do with it. William Somerset Maugham (author), The art of dying graciously is nowhere advertised in spite of the fact that its market potential is great. Milton Mayer (author), At my age, I do what Mark Twain did. Funny Answers to How Are You Doing? 3. Financially? Going strong. 12. If you're going to be two-faced, you could at least make one of them pretty.